Wednesday, June 13, 2018

We Weep For Our Loss & Celebrate Mom's Gain

Last night I leaned over the bathroom sink ringing out the dress that my mom wore to her 50th anniversary party last November. Hitting that monumental milestone was one of the most supreme accomplishments of mom’s life and she was so worried Dad was going to do something crazy and not be there to celebrate it. A few days before their anniversary Dad was invited to go to work with my brother and visit a buffalo ranch. Mom said, “George C, don’t get yourself killed messing with those buffalo. I want to make it to our 50th!” They did it and mom said over and over that she was so blessed to have all these years with her honey she’d picked out on the school bus in 6th grade.

Memories flood my mind as my tears blend into mom’s dress. This is the last dress we will see mom in now that she’s gone to her forever home with Jesus. We only got four short months to care for mom before cancer ravaged her body and God called her home, saving her from her suffering.
Our precious mother died at sunrise on June 10, 2018 at the age of 68.  Mom always liked the dawn of morning, hence my middle name “Dawn”. I bet it was a gorgeous sunrise view as our mom entered Heaven.

Mom’s funeral will be held this Friday at 10:30 AM at The Fairfield Center,  200 Maine St.,  Meeker, CO 81641. The funeral home is Grant’s Mortuary. 

Thank you for keeping our family in your prayers as we celebrate mom’s life and grieve the forever hole left in our hearts.  We weep for our loss, but celebrate mom’s gain.

Mom, I've missed you a thousand times already. Your husband aches deep in his bones for you. Boy did Dad love you! We can't wait to have a cup of tea with you over a long chat again one day.

A note from a granddaughter:
Four months is way too little for my Grammy! No one was ready for her to go, yet she is no longer suffering through all of this tough cancer but singing and living her best life up in heaven with god! She is such an inspiration to all of us and we will never really be ready to say goodbye! ~ Written by Alyssa Rose Wright

Wednesday, June 6, 2018

Treatment 1 done, so now I’m with momma

Yesterday went by super fast and all went well! 

I had part of my entourage to support me as I took my first doses of clinical trial meds! No side effects or reactions, praise the Lord! I was so tired I couldn’t keep my eyes open tho and fell asleep until evening when I had to pick Alyssa up from a pool party and come home to pack for a trip to see my momma! The doctor and clinical trial nurse said I could come, so Alyssa and I didn’t waste any time and we are already happily in the mountain air! 

As much as I praise God for feeling good and able to come here today, my heart breaks for my mom is is suffering and struggling so much.  It is very hard to see her so frail and needy. She has by far NEVER been a needy mom, so this is new territory for all of us. 

THANK YOU for praying for me yesterday! Keep praying the side effects away and for moms cancer to die and her to be able to eat and grow stronger. 

My faithful friend and husband.

Mom needs a big assortment to choose from as she works to get preotein and calories! 

And.... I cannot forget to wish our little miracle baby a happy happy 6th birthday today! My miracle in 2012 put my sister, Katy, right into labor with sweet Caden. 

Love you Caden! 

Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Dear Lord, Is Asking For Three Miracles Selfish?

Psalm 126:4-6 The Message (MSG)

And now, God, do it again
    bring rains to our drought-stricken lives
So those who planted their crops in despair
    will shout hurrahs at the harvest,
So those who went off with heavy hearts
    will come home laughing, with armloads of blessing.

I cannot believe that Isaiah and Alyssa, along with my niece and nephew, Kacey and Breck, were this tiny when God gave me a true miracle on June 05, 2012.
You can read more about this miracle by clicking here.

Now, on this same day, June 5th, six years later I am begging God to grant me two more miracles!
I would think this selfish, but over my life I have seen how far and deep and wide my God's love is for me.  This understanding has only come through the suffering. 

I begin a new chapter of my cancer journey today and it is intertwined with my past - in both joys and sufferings. I believe ALL things happen for a purpose and are part of God's plan to draw us nearer to Him, to bring Him glory by revealing his character and to populate the kingdom of Heaven.

With this in mind, here are several things that are no coincidence.
  1. My mom is battling for her life against Multiple Myeloma in Colorado.
  2. I got to be there when Mom was diagnosed and fight for her like she fought for me.
  3. I am getting the first hand experience of a caregiver, just as I have the experience of being the patient. Both require a ton of intentional dependence on God. 
  4. Mom's oncologist helped me find the clinical trial I've been needing for years.
  5. My local oncologist was willing to bring this trial into NWA just for me - and hopefully others going forward, now that its open and active here. #beyondthankful
  6. I was barely able to get into this trial before the deadline of a temporary closing to new patients. I got enrolled on the eve of the very last day, only by finding a loop hole.
  7. I will begin my trial today - God willing - on June 5, 2018 - my miracle day.
  8. I was up most of the night not feeling well, with plenty of time to talk to God and hear Him say - go write about this.
  9. God has sustained my life since I was diagnosed with Primary Vaginal Adenocarcinoma November 2010. I am still here for a purpose. 
  10. I need a miracle today and my mom needs a miracle today as well. We need these latest treatments to work, killing metastatic cancer cells for both of us.

Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
WILL find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
This I declare about the Lord;
He ALONE is my refuge, my place of safety;
He is my God, and I trust Him.
For He will rescue [Patsy & Kristina] from EVERY trap
and protect [Patsy & Kristina] from deadly disease.
Psalms 91:1-3

Please join us in asking for two more miracles today!
God please allow me to get to start my trial today even thought I am not feeling well.
Please allow this trial to kill all cancer cells and leave me with NED (no evidence of disease).
Please protect me from any and all side effects so that I may live fully even while having treatment.
Please heal my momma. Kill off all her cancer. Speak personally to her so that she may feel your presence today as she suffers and perseveres for you Glory. We claim truth that although a thousand fall at [our] side and ten thousand are dying around [us] these evils will not touch us. (Ps 91:7)

Thank you for continuing on this journey with our family as we love and support and give lots of grace to each other, with the expectant hope of the Lord's healing!