And Then I Said Amen

“The Devil saw me with my head down and thought he’d won until I said amen!”And many of you said amen! 

Thank you for taking my health, my finances, my marriage, my children, my medical caregivers and my entire family to the Lord in prayer for SOOOO many years! The Bible says to keep asking, keep seeking, keep knocking. That is what we’ve done and today once again God has answered our prayers and been gracious to me with good news. 

The new MRI shows the enlarged spot in my brain is NOT new active cancer. It is radiation necrosis. Basically my immune system has responded to the dead cells from prior radiation and things are a bit swollen right now. But it is not active cancer and I’m humbled and thrilled! 

As if that wasn’t enough good news, we were also told that the enlarged tumor in my left lower lung may be an inflammatory reaction to being sick or fighting off an infection. We will rescan in 3 weeks to double check. Scan 9/22 and results 9/29. Please pray and ask God to show us favor with miraculous healing and clarity of scans to show it! May God show himself off through my healing and sustained life…quality of life even! 

What a change of plans as the dr had me scheduled for Avastin (IV maintenance med) starting today. I believe God said you don’t need maintenance, you need cured! ✝️

Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. - Matthew 7:7 

Scan results

Scan results were frustrating and discouraging to me. I had such great expectations and yet Dr B said that there is some growth in my brain that he hopes is nflammation around where I had radiation on a tumor last year. There is another type of MRI that I can get to show if this appears to be inflammation or tumor. I have been having more daily headaches. 

There is growth on a tumor in the lower left lung and my oxygen level has stayed lower than normal for the last couple months. 

The tumor they just radiated about 5 weeks ago in my adrenal gland looks unchanged and there are no brand new spots. 

Dr B wants me to start back on Avastin as a maintenance plan right away. This means an IV treatment every 3 weeks. I have taken Avastin before with Taxol chemo, but never alone, so we’ll see how it effects me. 

I feel in dread of this plan and discouraged that we didn’t get better news of continued remission, but fighting to stay positive about the situation and just be thankful for life and the option available to me. 

Please ask God to enter into this situation and show Himself big and mighty and faithful to complete a good work in me and HEAL me of this cancer and the wound slowly starting to show slight signs of healing on my leg. Ask for healing for this fistula all together please. 

Until then, may I use this thorn in my side to remember why I am here and choose to glorify God and share His light to the world with joy that only he can give…even when I’m unhappy with the situation. 

Blessings to you and yours my friends. 

Kristi ✝️👆🏻🙏🏻

Here we are on a weekend getaway that I am so grateful for. Brough much happiness and soothing to my soul. 

Post radiation scans

In the life of a cancer patient, especially a stage 4 metastatic cancer patient, scans roll around way too often. It is time for mine again this week. I’ll have a 2 hour MRI and a CT scan on Monday followed by a 1 hour MRI and an Oncologist appointment on Wednesday. 

I feel pretty at peace about these scans. I am just dreading the pre-meds before my CT and laying in the MRI machine for two hours. My prayer is that God continues to sustain my life and that if it’s His will, He will allow me to be in remission. 

I honestly have so many things on my mind lately that I sometimes don’t even allow myself to think about my scans much, let alone pray about them. For example, I am thinking about my son moving back to college soon, Chris & Brittany transitioning to life working and going to school this fall with a baby, our daughter suffering through some very trying times of her own, plus Billy & I working toward our dream of owning a wedding and event venue opening early 2022. 

Just like many of you, our life can sometimes feel overwhelming. Recently I have been working to write down things, big or small, that I am thankful for. This helps me keep my perspective when I am burdened, worried, disgruntled or impatient. I especially get impatient waiting on God to show up and help me or the people I care about. I hate to know other people ate suffering and God could help them. Do you ever feel that way? Like, where is God in this or that situation?  Why is he taking so long to intervene? 

Recently my sister sent me a screenshot of a writing that describes three levels of faith. The first being when we can see and feel proof to help us believe. The second is when we feel it, but can’t see it. The third is when we see and feel no evidence that God is working and present in our situation. I am reminded that my faith is not based on my feelings or the evidence I can see (i .e. scan reports, my peace of mind or lack thereof); but my faith is based on my choice to believe that ALL of the Bible is true. 

During one of Rick Warren’s Healing Choices’ podcasts recently he said, “If we don’t care enough to pray for something more than once or twice it is not really that important to us; not a desire of our hearts”. 

Well God, I and many others have been praying that I be healed from this cancer for many years. I am patiently (sometimes impatiently) waiting for your perfect timing to heal me in this life or the next, but regardless, I have faith that day will come and I’ll be ready. I have faith that God wants to give me the desires of my heart. He wants my husband and children to have the desires of their hearts too. He wants this for you as well. 

Let’s challenge each other to pray repeatedly asking God for what we need and want, choosing to believe that He hears us and loves us even when we don’t see or feel it. 

One of my Mom’s favorite verses is Psalm 37:3-4, “Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”  

It will not touch us!

Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night, nor the arrow that flies in the day, do not dread the disease that stalks in the darkness, nor the disaster that strikes at midday. Though a thousand may fall at your side, though ten thousand are dying around you, these evils will not touch you. 

These verses from Psalms 91:5-7 are some of my favorite to pray and claim for myself and many others over the years. Today I am claiming them for myself as I finished my high dose radiation to my adrenal gland, but also for my brother-in-law, Gaylen Murphy, as he’s been in the UAMS hospital for over two weeks and could have a couple more to go depending on how his body reacts to treatment for the multiple myeloma that is all throughout his bones. He is having a stem cell transplant, which means they have given him chemo to wipe out his white blood cells/immune system, and then they will build it back up and harvest his stem cells over 2-5 days. Be praying that this all can happen as quickly as safely possible so he and his wife, Dolly, can get out of the hospital and get back home for a while.  Gaylen is a trooper! He can only sit-up real straight on the edge of his bed or lay down pretty flat in the bed to stay out of pain, yet he is working hard to do 15 laps with his walker each day, bringing jokes and smiles to everyone he passes. Billy and I were happy we got to go visit he and Dolly in Little Rock last week. I slept most of the drive down and back thanks to Billy driving us. I have been pretty nauseated as the radiation hit some of my stomach causing extra acid and nausea. I am improving so I can eat a bit more and gain some energy and stamina back. I hope to hike a little on a Colorado vacation soon - please God?!? 

Thanks for praying and please remember you can donate to Gaylen & Dolly to help with all their extra expenses with this link! We all appreciate you so much! 

https://gofund.me/ce61266e

May this be the last of it!

Several weeks ago the doctors found active cancer in my adrenal gland (sits right above my kidney). Everything else looked stable, thank goodness, but this needs taken care of. It was decided that radiation is required so today I have my first targeted radiation therapy to kill this remaining cancer. I will only need 5 high dose treatments given every other day through next week. I’m dreading it because I’ve gotten a break but it’s necessary and will hopefully be the last of active cancer. Side effects are nausea, stomach pain and even ulcers, and fatigue. 

The PET scan showed a tiny bit of activity in my lower lung but they feel that could be inflammation, so let’s pray and claim that to be the case. 

Lastly, will you pray that a fistula wound I have had for a few months heals. The fistula is an open track between my abdomen and my upper thigh, most likely following a muscle they flipped from my leg to build flaps in my abdomen 8 years ago.  The gyn oncology specialists reviewed my case in their tumor board meeting and they all agreed it could cause me more harm to open my scar tissue filled abdomen to fix it, than to leave it alone. However, it is a wound that requires dressing changes 2-3 times a day and can be painful with activity or even with sitting in an upright position. Sometimes these fistula wounds heal on their own and sometimes they don’t, but healing could take a decade. Please please pray that God gives me a miracle and heals this fistula to improve quality of life soon! It feels a bit overwhelming to add yet another medical dressing I need to maintain every day forever.  For those of you just joining my story, I already have two permanent ostomy bags to care for. 

Thank you for caring and praying friends! HAPPY JUNE! 

You won’t believe this Thanksgiving News!

How wonderful it is to share this news with you all today. Not only in honor of my parent’s 53rd wedding anniversary, which I know my mom is smiling down upon, but also in honor of this Thanksgiving season. We are living in a year, and a world, where we need hope and encouragement desperately. 

November 15th marked TEN YEARS since I was originally diagnosed with cancer. During that time so many things happened. We’ve lived in 4 different homes, learned about Billy’s oldest son and my step son, Christopher. Chris chose a wonderful bride and now we are excited to be grandparents this next March. Isaiah went from a goofy middle school boy to a respectable young man, played tons of basketball, and even more football, graduated high school and moved into a dorm in college. Alyssa grew from a little toddler to a beautiful teen. She experienced ballet and cheer, basketball, track, choir and pageantry. We’ve all dealt with Covid 19 and quarantine and been exposed and tested. We’ve experienced worry, stress and mental health issues. I went from a successful career as Director of sales calling on Walmart and Sam’s Club, to disability and now self employed. Billy went from going back to college and making the Dean’s list each semester, to a career in the Metal building industry and now self employed. We are chasing a dream and remodeling a barn for a wedding and event center on 6 acres with trees and a pond! We are so excited! 

So much life has been lived in the midst of really really hard stuff. Chemo 3 times, radiation on 5 different places, a clinical trial weekly for almost two years, so many surgeries and physical therapy and rehabilitation. Side effects from all these treatments including Auto Immune Hepatitis and Pancreatitis. Even more difficult was missed valentine’s Days, missed sporting events, missed birthdays and other holidays. Lost Uncles, Aunts, Grandparents, friends and both of our precious moms. I’m so grateful all of this was covered in tons of prayer! We’d have never made it. 

But on the first day of my ELEVENTH year of cancer I had scans and the doctor said I am in REMISSION! He said he cannot explain it, but evidence of active cancer is gone! He said it can only be described as a miracle! 

I am in shock. Billys in shock. Kids are shocked and relieved. I’ve been trying to find my words to share this and I am left with no words, just repeating what the doctor said. 

So today, as a gift to my parents on what would have been their 53rd anniversary, I honor my dad in life and my mom in death, by sharing that Jesus gave me a miracle. A miracle that both of my parents trusted God  for and asked Him for regularly. 

If you don’t know this Jesus, this God, I want to tell you about Him. For he is faithful and comforting, surprising and strong. 

How thankful I am for this good news, and for all that God has carried my family and I through for an entire decade. 

Philippians 4:6-7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Happy happy Thanksgiving! 

Endoscopic ultra sound ✅

Today at the OU Medical Center I had an Endoscopic Ultrasound. The main goal was to determine why I’ve been suffering with pancreatitis when all normal causes have been ruled out. 

There was a spot deep in my liver, too deep to biopsy today. We’ve known I have a spot on my liver that comes and goes on the CT Scan. There was some agitation at the entry to my small intestine. No cancer looking issues. And there is a mass in the tail of my pancreas. However, it did not look like a normal cancer mass would look, but they biopsies it and we will hear back in a couple days. The GI Doctor said it can very we’ll be inflammation. 

I am feeling better pain-wise, but need to work on strength, stamina and endurance. I’m still eating small and bland and they said that needs to continue for now. I did eat beef stew while in OKC last night tho and it sure had a lot of flavor, but didn’t cause me any trouble thank goodness. 

Everyone at the OU Medical Center was just as nice and helpful as I remembered them to be; albeit a new department than before. 

Thank you for prayers! Signing off from my couch in a lingering sleepy state. 😂😍 😴