Thursday, February 24, 2011

Loving Her...

My name is Katy and I am Kristi's baby sister. I have walked very closely in this cancer journey with her and that IS a true blessing. I very easily could have missed out on being here for her but GOD had other plans. He knew what my husband and I didn't while making a very hard and stressful decision to move. We recently moved here from Austin, TX and during the transition of the move she offered that me, my husband, and my son live with her and her family. We found out she had cancer shortly after we moved and I was so grateful that I could be with her. I have been mostly a care taker of the house and her kids while this is going on and not so much of the one that takes her to appointments. While this is a form of supporting her it definitely does not feel the same as supporting her at her appointments. I waited patiently for my turn and with my sister Amy's help babysitting my son I was able to go to what was going to be her last Chemo appointment. (Although we didn't know that at the time.)  I took Kristi's big camera and told her that we were going to document "chemo day"! I have a passion for pictures and all that they can share with people. Not only do they let you in to very intimate moments like this but they let you really feel what you see. When I look at the picture at the beginning of Chemo and the last one at the end of the day it breaks my heart. I watched her walk in sick and walk out even more sick. Sometimes pictures are hard to see but it's someones reality. Sadly, it's my big sister's reality. The sister that always has Joy in her heart and all the energy that I wished I had! I remember my mom saying she hated that "they are going to have to make her sick to make her better". When this all started Kristi was not sick, she didn't have symptoms, and sure enough they have made her very, very sick. I have seen it all happen right before me and as much as she wants to be herself she just simply can't. The Lord will renew her spirit and I am grateful that we know Him and that through Him all things are possible.

The start of our day in our matching purple shirts!!  
"When sisters stand shoulder to shoulder, who stands a chance against us?"  ~Pam Brown    


I brought some purple paper and told Kristi that we were going to have to come up with at least three words each through out the day to express how we were feeling!  As you will be able to see the words are much different from the patient to the supporter! My first word was "SUPPORTIVE". I was so happy to actually be able to go to an appointment with her. It made my heart very happy. I know that for her it's such a hard day but I was very grateful to be by her side. 
Kristi's first word was "EXHAUSTED"! Some way to start the day!
It was absolutely freezing in there! brrrrr.......
Well, the words say it all!! Kristi started having a hard time coming up with just one word for her signs!! You can't help what you feel!!! Haha!
So many feelings....not sure which one's to pick!?!?
Very sick and ......
Never been so Proud!!! All that Kristi has gone through and still is going through is such a testament to all of us. She has done it with such courage and strength, even in her weakest moments. She is my "Warrior Princess"!! :)
Kristi, I have never been more proud or grateful to be by your side than during this journey. God knew what this year held for you and our family. He knew that I would be sick with sadness if I still lived in Austin. To Him I am very grateful. We needed each other in this move/illness. I am forever grateful for what you have done for my family to move here. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else. I love you deeply. ~Katy 
 "A sister is a gift to the heart, a friend to the spirit, a golden thread to the meaning of life."  ~Isadora James


  1. Katy. - you have been an amazing comfort and help to me! It is amazing how God puts all the pieces together while we are so unaware and just taking one step at a time. Thank you for your words and the pics as we'll use them as we celebrate life for years to come! I love you!

  2. This post was one of the best. Loved the words and enjoyed seeing a sister that I have never seen that obviously loves you very much .